My Alexandra
by onexblackxrose
Summary: I was inspired by the movie, The Notebook to write this. It's really its own story centered around a man having to leave the love of his life to go to war. This documents his psychological and physical hardships while away.
1. Prologue

My Alexandra

Prologue:

His eyes spoke for his lack of diction. They smoldered with inconceivable torture as she stood before him. The gold flecks clouded as the tears formed upon his lashes. He ached to press a cool finger to her soft lips, to wake the quavering rosebuds from their slumber. He would never forget this moment. He would never live a day without seeing that angels face, contorted in profound grief, but as heavenly beautiful as the first day she stepped into his life. And he would never regret a single instance more than now, more than hurting the one person he treasured most.

The pack weighed heavily on his shoulders as he felt the goodbye building in the back of his throat. No words would ever do justice to the crime he was committing by leaving her here. He inhaled deeply, one last wisp of her sweet aroma stinging his senses. He turned the full force of his eyes upon her, he had to make her understand, she had to know; this wasn't what he wanted. He could see her body trembling as she stepped forward cautiously. One last embrace, one last fleeting kiss. The strangled words, "I love you" escaped her as she pulled away. He whispered them back afraid he might not have the courage to leave if he grasped their true meaning. With one last chilling glance at her somber face he turned resolutely and headed to the roaring helicopter.

That was the last time I saw her. The last time God granted me the chance to hold an angel in my arms.

My Alexandra.


	2. Chapter 1

My Alexandra

The dirt rose up in a whirl of sudden anticipation as the chopper fumbled for its grasp onto the earth. We filed out in an orderly fashion as the roar of the blades deafened our surroundings. The angry growl of the chopper did not cease with that one sense, it traveled deep into our chests. It rumbled with anticipating chaos, it was the road ahead & our last touch with the past. I remember the sinking feeling I got as the chills ran up my arms. I debated with myself the repercussions of making a dash back to its taunting bubble of safety, but my thinning pride held me to my orders. We all stood squinting as the dust kicked back up and our last crutch got lost in the sun's setting grace. I glanced at the group of men I had arrived with. I could see it in all their faces, I could hear it in the shallow quick breaths escaping their lips, and as their hands came down from shielding their view I felt that impending fear echoing in my own lifeless eyes. With a heavy sigh, we threw the bags over our shoulders and trudged toward the tents sent up in the wavering distance.

The fear was intoxicating that night. I choked back a gasp of terror as I lay in my cot staring at the weathered tarp above. My body shook with trembling quakes as I tried to seize onto a piece of myself that I remembered. Her face flashed before my eyes and my panic stilled. I sifted through our memories, a slight smile playing on my lips. I replayed my favorite moment, our defining moment, the only thing that could possibly calm this fury of trepidation within me.

The air was sweet, it clung to the back of my throat as I greedily took in deep breaths of its heavenly perfume. The sun was dipping ever so slightly over the horizon beyond as we walked hand in hand captivated by God's display of wonder; the orange and red enveloping the sky in day's last stand against the unfolding night. The cobbled path we wandered circled around the small pond behind the local ball field. Its overgrown shrubs tickled my bare ankles as we passed lazily into a common lull of normalcy.

I stole a glance at Allie as she studied the pond's everlasting ripples. In my mind I traced the contours of her face, so perfectly smooth like God himself strived for perfection with her very creation. The corners of her lips tightened into a grimace as I noticed a pair of ducks glide down upon the water's surface. This was just so definitive of her; her love of nature's quiet phenomenon and her utter distaste for anything that should alter this tranquility. I saw her eyes leave the ducks and stray to an empty corner of the pond searching for the slow push of water upon the shore, the gradual ebb and flow of cattails leaning on the banks. The creases in her brow thinned out and the tensed muscles in her shoulders slowly slackened as she delved back into her serene stupor. I felt myself grinning as I took in all that she embodied, all that she stood for, and all that I loved.

This day of blissful happiness was of course before the news, before the gorge that formed between us. This day had a purpose, most likely the greatest decision of my life, and the slight pull in my right pocket kept that notion on my mind every second that we spent together.

We made it to the far bank of the pond where the air was thick with summer's gentle silence. I spun her towards me placing her other hand in my own, she giggled with the sudden change of pace. I looked straight into the face of a goddess on earth, my heavenly gift to treasure for the rest of my life. Our eyes met and I saw everything I would ever need staring right back at me. My hands shook as I realized how much this one person meant to me. A flash of fear crossed my mind at the thought of losing her, fore I would surely die inside. She gave me the light to endure the darkness. Allie was the everlasting star that emblazoned the sky when I had lost my way. She renewed my sense of life and gave me a reason to live, a reason to breathe, a chance to love. And as I knelt down in front of her, beside the pond behind the old ball park, I made a deal with God. If he let me keep my angel, I would look in those shining eyes with this same lasting devotion forever and always.

That was the moment I proposed, the moment God bestowed upon me my soulmate.

My Alexandra.


End file.
